Sunday, May 6, 2012

Day Ten

Ten days into this ten day festival, and I've discovered that I can update the blog from my cellphone in the theatre lobby. Lovely!

Yesterday I started to tear up at the opening commercials.... Aha. I have just discovered one of the mountains, no, limitations on/of doing this on my cellscell phone- apparently no ability to delete the last word I've sorted, no, written. coupled with Swype, this should make for an interesting entry. I'll try to keep in (it) brief.

Chivasvivas Las Antipas (that is nowhere closerclose to the total/title of the movie) was a flowery display of post production magnificence. It was aboutabout....never mind.

Laura kinda sucked.

Shut up and play the hits was incredible.

The world before her was as good d as premixed, or promised. Try to see it today if you can.

If any body ooutroout (out) there woo knows somebody who works for Android, blogger or chrome, can you please let them know I need to have a word with them? Thanks.

Saturday, May 5, 2012

Death of a Theatre

Just saw this on fb:

http://www.blogto.com/deadpool/2012/05/cumberland_cinema_set_to_enter_the_deadpool/

So sad. Just the other day I was sitting in that theatre thinking, "how the hell is this theatre still here?"

This means that the 4:00 screening of Laura today will be my last movie ever at the Cumberland. :(

Gettin Lazy

I haven't been posting too much, mostly because I don't think anybody is reading this anymore, maybe because i haven't been posting much. It's a vicious cycle.

Blah blah blah.

Ok. I've seen a bunch of movies and they've been pretty good. I liked the following: Queen of Versailles, Sexy Baby.

Angie O'Driscoll is one of the most annoying people I've ever been forced to watch on stage. She's one of the programmers that introduces films and moderates the q & a's. It's amazing how much she irritates me. I know that's not very nice but I had to get it off my chest.

Does anyone else find The Volunteer at the beginning to be quite endearing? And how awesome is it that there are no more FORD COMMERCIALS before the movies this year??? A SINGLE TANK OF GAS!!!

The World Before Her won the Canadian feature award and has gotten tons of buzzzzz and I'm nervous because I'm supposed to see it tomorrow morning and I'm worried about getting in, because even though I have this fancy thing called a Premium Pass, hot docs has this counterrevolutionary status called "Industry Rush" where even though I've spent $200 some odd dollars for "access to all non-concurrent regular Festival screenings"(I'm quoting from the back of the pass) I get to stand in a special rush line up for industry douchebags if the movie is too popular. That wasn't very nice of me. Again!! Not all douchebags, but for the most part...

Anyways, time to get back to Draw Something and then off to the movies. I'm not even going to read this over. So there.


Wednesday, May 2, 2012

Hackers and Penises

hot docs!!!!

Last night was a perfect specimen (more about those in a minute) of a fabulous night at hot docs. Putting the movies aside for a minute, the theatres were packed, the audiences were excited and the q and a's were interesting and fun for all. It was also my first movie at the new Bloor cinema. Aside from the screen being off-puttingly high (is that new? I can't remember), the seats were luxuriously comfortable.

The Bloor was the setting for my first screening of the evening - We Are Legion: The Story of the Hacktivists. This movie, about Anonymous, was the story of the online hacking network behind the attacks on Scientology and various other unsavory governmental organizations and businesses (like Paypal! and Mastercard!). It was an interesting look into what I previously thought was a secret world, but now know identifies as open and inclusive. I can't wait to leap on to 4chan and join in all the fun! The screening would have been even better if the man two seats over from me did not have the most severe case of halitosis I've ever smelled. During the q & a, there was an appearance by an "Anon" in his signature Guy Fawkes mask. He didn't speak but he emplyed many thumbs ups and mime-like poses. It was one of the first q & a's I saw at the festival this year where a subject was in attendance. Everybody loved the movie-I know because the applause-o-meter was off the charts!

After that, we were off the the Royal to see a couple movies about penises, with a quick stop for some Fresh Slices across the road. The screening was for The Final Member with a short film in front called Manhood - my favorite combo of the festival so far, for several reasons, which I will now enumerate.

1. I got popcorn. I like popcorn.
2. All of the filmmakers were from Toronto, so the theatre was packed with excited friends and family.
3. The movies were hilarious.
4. Penis.
Manhood was a very short film made by some students from Humber. It was a fine example of a movie with very little artistic or technical merit, but with a fabulous story, and tight editting (it clocked in at 5 minutes). It was a first person account of a young man who broke his penis during a particularly ambitious sex romp while on vacation with his new girlfriend in Jamaica. Laughter ensues.

The Last Member was one of the better movies I've ever seen at hot docs. It was one of those documentaries where you couldn't have written better characters. You gotta get a load of this man from California who has nicknamed his penis "Elmo" and is so enamoured with his member that he wants to cut it off, while he's alive, and display it in the world's only penis museum in Iceland. Another fun fact: according to well established folklore, the "legal size" for a penis in Iceland is 5 inches. 

Those two are screening again, try to see them if you can.